I've tried to make friends - there's this one girl that's really nice that I try to talk to every time I have class, but our conversation doesn't really get that far. And there's a couple of others that I've tried to befriend day after day that don't really get anywhere. Everyone already has their own friends or doesn't want any new ones. Not even temporary ones that could make good aerobic class buddies.
Which really, I'm fine with. I want them to all know Jesus, but they don't have to be my friend.
It was particularly evident that I didn't have any friends in my aerobics class today when my awesome gym teacher took us to the Nature Preserve for a hike. While we were waiting for our teacher to arrive, I stood by and talked to the girl I always try to talk to, but when we got started she wanted to walk at her own pace which evidently not the pace I was at.
The trek up the hills wasn't too bad - it was a beautiful day out and I was going to listen to my iPod but the battery was dead. I sang Brooke Fraser's "Love is Waiting" song to myself because the autumn leaves all around me made me think of it and singing it was at the same pace that I was walking.
Anyway, I'm listening to everyone complain as we go up, just singing my song over and over again until we finally reached the top. It was hard, but when we got there I exhaled deeply and just kept saying that God is good over and over again.
When we finally started heading down, I ended up walking by myself for most of the way. I was a good distance behind the really fast group and a good distance in front of the really slow group. It was great because I was feeling introverted and very reflective today and felt like I needed to just soak up His creation. I didn't feel very good coming to class because I had to interrupt a very important conversation to rush to finish my paper and rush to find my class at the Nature Preserve entrance. And I wore jeans, stupidly thinking it might have been cold out. But the hike was refreshing. Walking by myself and just taking in His creation was refreshing. I had peace.
I thought it was a symbolic walk for some things that are going on in my life. I've recently had a couple of other walks in different environments under different circumstances that I feel (as cheesy as it may sound) were symbolic in some way. I say that because I feel like I'm reading a novel of my life, and if I was reading my life, I'd totally point to those walks and say, "That's a metaphor for this," or "That's totally symbolic of this."
Don't make fun of me. I like literature, thank you very much. Heck, it's probably because I'm reading Donald Miller's A Million Miles in a Thousand Years.
In any case, I love that I know in my mind and feel in my heart that God is very much walking with me wherever I go.
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