you there! wutchu readin' ma blog for?

i was looking through some people's blogs on the sidebar of this blog. not too many people update anymore. it's kind of makes me sad. i love reading other people's blogs, not primarily for entertainment, but just getting a glimpse of another person's life and a glimpse of what goes on in their head is fascinating for me. it's a story...a true-life story that adds a chapter every time the person blogs.

it makes me wonder who actually reads my blog. i know some people who have blogs who read this blog, but i know there are other people (known and unknown) that don't have blogs that may read this. it makes me curious as to who actually reads this.

but at the same time, i like blogging because my response to when others blog and what others blog about is a response i hope other people receive from mine. i started this blog not only to share my thoughts and feelings to entertain.

i blog because i have a story to tell. that is why i write. i've been struggling with my writing for several years now because i get self-conscious about and fear finishing a novel and submitting it for publication, knowing full well that it will probably be rejected a million times over before getting published somewhere by someone. i have a story to tell and i want to share that story with all of you. i blog here to help me practice telling everyone my story in a way that is engaging and honest, which is what i'll be doing when i write a novel (well, not necessarily honest because it'll be fiction, but sincerely).

i'm trying to learn to write for me and for God, and anyone else who gets on board will get on board, and anyone else who doesn't, won't.

so maybe it's a good thing i don't know who exactly is reading my blog or when they're reading it. that way you know i'm not catering to certain people's interests, trying to blog about something to entertain others. i'm being honest and sincere about my thoughts here. it's why i don't really care about the comments. if you have a comment, you comment. if you don't, you don't. that's the way the reading world works out there - the author's not going to know everyone who reads their book.

i'm here to tell a story. my story.

and one day, i'll publish a novel to tell someone else's story.